"Why are we talking about Trannies* in math class?"

I feel really shitty guys,
I've been really upset ever since this happened today.

So picture it, 3rd period Statistics class.
I'm hungry, I'm tired, and class is almost over.

We're going over a problem when the teacher makes a comment about there being like a zero percent chance of a guy getting pregnant.

She forgot that isn't true.
She forgot I was in the room.

Everyone agrees with her though.

I don't know why I wanted to pick a fight today.
I usually pick my battles.
This wasn't even that important.
But I had to--

"Some guys can get pregnant",  I say.

Everyone is like, what? That doesn't make sense!

"Well, some guys, Transgender guys, or otherwise, have vaginas. They can get pregnant".

More confusion.
Embarrassment sets in.
I felt sick to my stomach.

One kid goes,
"Why are we talking about Trannies* in math class?"

At that moment, I literally died.
I fucking died.
I was right,
But I looked like the dumbest fucking person.
Everyone was laughing.

The commotion died down and my teacher gave us our homework assignment.

The bell rang.

And then,
I start crying.
I start sobbing and shaking so hard.
Someone in my class and the teacher ran over to comfort me.
But I couldn't be comforted.
They just didn't understand.

I met up with my best friend.
I felt a little better.
But I still felt terrible.
Just last week I broke down because I just wanted to be normal.

I understand that people don't understand.
They don't understand me,
They don't understand people like me.

So I get that people were confused.
They didn't know what the hell I was talking about.

But,
I just felt so sad,
Like I didn't exist.
I was sitting right there and I didn't exist.

You don't think stuff like this can happen,
Until it happens to you.
And it hurts.

I wrote something in the study I had next,
instead of doing math homework:

"Untitled
I forgot to choose my battles.
I forgot that I was different, until I was reminded.
I forgot, that when your identity is strange to others,
You have to remember.

You can't forget to watch the way you dress
Watch the way you act
Watch how loud or happy or proud you are
In fact, don't be proud at all.

Monitor yourself.
Make sure you're "unclockable".
Make sure you aren't "too gay".
Pull your pants up.
Take your hoodie off.
Be a man.
Be white.
Be straight.
Be rich.
Be mentally stable.
Be cis.
Be able to walk, and see, and hear.
Be Christian.
Be normal.
Be normal.
Be normal.
Be normal.

No.

Fuck normal!
Be human.
Look how you want to look.
Say what you want.
Feel how you feel.
Be every color of the rainbow.
Be gay, straight, bi, whatever else, or nothing at all.
Believe in whatever the fuck you want, or don't believe in things you don't want to believe in.
Believe in yourself.
Be all you can be and do all you can do.
Defy expectations.
Remember your strengths.
Remember your weaknesses.
Be wrong.
Be right.
Be real.
Be love.
Be loud.
Be proud.
Be you."



*Tranny is an offensive term for the Trans community. The same way the N word is offensive when referring to Black/People of Color.
Don't use it.